Dressing Up

This weekend, Tae and I went to watch Boston Dragon Boat Festival.  I admit, I know very little about the story behind the dragon boats (someone got thrown in some river, that's all I know).  I do know that when we went to the festival, we wore our regular clothes - t-shirts and jeans, that kind of stuff.

What I do know was that I found it a little odd to see people wearing "Chinese-y" outfits at the festival.  I should just call them costumes because that's what they were.  And sure, I'm willing to hope that maybe some of these families had spent time in Hong Kong or something, and that maybe they did have some awareness of Chinese culture.  But, I saw an ENTIRE family all dressed up in color coordinated shirts.  And by entire family, I mean the three kids and what appeared to be their mother and father.  (I should mention.  They appeared to be white.)

And I'm down with other people being curious about different cultures.  And I'm willing to admit that I'm not the most knowledgeable about Chinese culture.  But, what I'm not down with is people thinking that that's how Chinese people dress.  And I'm not down with exotifying any Asian culture without really examining some of the politics and values that go along with this.  Why is this so acceptable?  Why do people think this is a good idea? 

And I'm pretty sure that if we went to an Korean/Korean American festival, I wouldn't be dressing Tae up in a han bok. 

But, at the same time, I don't know what to say to people who do dress up in costumes like this.  I don't want to come off as being completely rude and angry, but at the same time, if no one ever says anything, nothing will ever change.  What would you say?

~ eliaday

Comments

[daddy in a strange land]

I take it, then, that the family was white? It's interesting, this issue of "traditional/cultural dress" vs. "costume," re: context and who's doing the wearing... Don't know what, if anything, I'd say in public to strangers, though...

[Sallie]

I remember a long, long time ago, there was a cultural festival that my Girl Scout troop participated in. We represented Japan (one of our troop leaders was Japanese). So all these 10 year old white girls dressed up in kimonos, taught people how to fold origami, and served a traditional Japanese meal to people visiting our booth.

It seems silly in hindsight, actually. But was there anything really offensive about it?

[honglien123]

For Tet and Tet festivals, we dress our kids up in Ao Dai. When we visit J's grandma at Christmas, the kid wear hanbok. When we visit the Japanese side at Christmas, the kids end up looking very preppy, but then J's grandpa was born in and raised in the US and so he's about as close to Japan as my son is to Vietnam. We mainly do this as we have a connection to each culture. Even though we're Asian, I doubt that we'd ever have our kids wear a cheong sam, because we're not Chinese. There's something really uncomfortable about seeing people who probably have nothing to do with a culture dress up in that culture's traditional dress.

That said, I think if you put in enough study and truly appreciate a culture or if you marry into it, you'd be justified in wearing that culture's traditional dress. For example, for Vietnamese people, there's a very popular white singer, Dalena, who sings in Vietnamese without an accent. She's just about the only white woman whom I don't cringe when I see a picture of her in an ao dai.

[honglien123]

PS What do would I do to a family of white people who were dressed in chinese costumes? I'd give them a funny look and keep walking. I think I'd hope other Asian people would give them funny looks as well and hope that all the funny looks together would inspire the white parents to think a little bit more about their choice of dress.

[Angie in Texas]

i, too, have mixed feelings about seeing non-members of an ethnic group "dressing up" in costume. i recently went to the asian american chamber of commerce dinner here and was a little perturbed by one of the women at my table. she was hispanic/latina, had no real connection with japan (i admit, i prodded during dinner conversation) but was dressed ALL the way in a kimono, shoes, hair and (geisha-like) makeup . . . i was in a hanbok, but then again, i'm korean.

i think i remember a post either here or on rice daddies that addressed this issue back near halloween re: dressing up as geisha, etc. that post really put into words what i was unable to express at the time.

[halfmama]

This is probably not very fair or nice, but I just snort and roll my eyes at scenes like this. I shouldn't, because I'm probably making a gross judgemental assumption about people who are probably perfectly nice and harmless. But in my opinion, they are 1. doing it to get attention, so they can say something like, "Oh, we spent time in X," and show off their 'knowledge,' and/or 2. making a gross judgemental assumption that others will care! They know they will stand out. They're attention-mongers. I find it totally disrespectful. Not in a 'screw you' kind of way, but in a selfish kind of way. For some weird reason, they think they are honoring a culture but in an ignorant way, they are totally dishonoring it.

I'm sure that's not fair. Even reading this again, it sounds awful. I wish I could articulate better why I get so annoyed with this.

For the record Sallie, I think that dressing up the little girls is an adorable idea and a wonderful way to help them learn about another culture and appreciate it. Parading your family around in mandarin-collared dresses and then going to a Chinese Festival... it reeks of seeking attention for oneself, and not at all about teaching anyone anything except how ridiculous you look.

[myuneuri]

I would probably think it was a little tacky, but offensive? I don't know. It would depend on intent.

Koreans in Korea often have white weddings where they "dress up" in white wedding dresses and tuxes. They usually don't understand the traditions associated with western weddings, but act them out so they can have these certain pictures. For example, the bride usually throws the bouquet to the photographer's assistant and the couple pretends to cut a plastic cake with a sword. I found it amusing, and questioned why they would want to have a wedding they don't have any connection to but I didn't ever say anything to anyone and I don't think I am entitled to say it.

I also didn't really think negatively about the 1996 or 1997? Miss Korea contestants for dressing in traditional Irish attire and trying to do traditional Irish dance a la Lord of the Dance.

What about the case of Asian or white singers who sing hip-hop and dress in that style? If you have no connection to African American culture, is it considered OK to do that?

Can non-whites dress up as cowboys and cowgirls for Halloween or the Calgary Stampede or are they not supposed to because they have no connection to ranch life in the west?

Maybe I should retire my hanbok. My FIL paid a lot of money for it and I try and wear it when I think the occasion suits (Chuseok, Solnal, family weddings, family photos, my daughter's dol, my husband's company Christmas party) but maybe I look inappropriate to Koreans?

[Kate]

While I get being offended by white people getting themselves tattooed in Asian languages they can't even read, I'm not sure how I feel about being offended that they've appropriated an Asian culture's unique style of dress. If we follow that logic, are (predominantly white) Americans allowed to be irritated that jeans and t-shirts have become the uniform of the world? That would be silly!

:)

[Rachel aka Weigook Saram]

To Kate and Myueneri, I think the difference is that Koreans (and everyone else) originally adopted Western-style dress because of colonialism and the dominance of the American media. So I don't think it's the same at all.

Having said that, for me, context is everything. I see nothing wrong with a white woman wearing a hanbok at her wedding if she marries a Korean man. Or even wearing one to someone else's (Korean) wedding, if all the other women are also wearing hanbok. We dressed our (half-Korean) daughter in a hanbok for her birthday, just because it's traditional.

[Angie in Texas]

one of my tatoos (the larger one) is in korean, but i'm korean and though i am not 100% literate in korean i know what it says and means . . . how do people know that the kanji or the hangul doesn't say "horse's butt" or "loser"?

[myuneuri]

Angie,
I have read about people getting these tatoos and ending up with something really inappropriate written on themselves. Too funny.

My husband finds it really strange that western people get words tatooed on themselves. Korean gangsters are the ones with tatoos in Korea. He often reads them to my when we are walking in the mall, but we haven't come across an unintentional one yet. I am not sure what I would do if we did.

[Angie in Texas]

in japan and korea, gangsters and criminals are the ones with tatoos. (it's why people with tats aren't allowed in bath houses) but i feel like what mine says is special to me and i am proud to be korean - its a part of me and who i am. my mom on the other hand took a while to warm up to it (she likes what it says, too.)

my sister claims she saw a korean tat that said something along the lines of "i'm an idiot."

[kim]

Context is essential; maybe the family spent time living overseas and wanted a chance to wear clothing that was gifted to them? Who knows what their rationale was... I wouldn't have been offended but probably would have given them a second look of puzzlement.

I have one hanbok and my daughter has several; we've worn them to family events when it was pretty much expected.

I was once invited to the 3-day wedding festivities of a very close Pakistani friend. She encouraged me to wear a borrowed Pakistani dress (salwar kameez, I think?) to more fully experience all aspects of the celebration. Everyone was very welcoming and I felt completely comfortable given the circumstances. Would I wear one to a local Pakistani festival? Nope - I wouldn't have any relationship to it, and therefore it just wouldn't feel right to me.

[HCG]

honglien123 I own a very modified Ao Dai. I say very modified b/c nearly 5 years ago or so Vietnam (style, etc.) was *the* trend in Korea and my mom came back with this outfit that my cousin got for me -- and it is my "go to" outfit...well not recently b/c I'm still working off the post baby weight but anyhooo...

[Carole in Korea]

Kate:

Your comments remind me of the fuss at the wedding I attended at Korea House two years ago. A Canadian man married a Korean woman, and all the foreigners in attendance wore hanbok, at the request of the bride and groom. (ie "if you have it, please wear it")

All the Korean guests received the same request, but most wore very casual clothing... or a suit in a few cases. The bride's family was pissed off, because while they'd heard the request, they didn't expect anyone to really follow it.

I do feel (and I think to some degree understand) the disapproval from Korean Americans when "white" people appropriate things that they feel some cultural protectiveness over, but I worry that KAs are quick to put the actions down to negative motivations.

For example, when my Buddhist coworker wore a rosary as jewelry, I said nothing, though my Irish Catholic grandmother would have seriously kicked her ass. Now, if she wore it on a day we had foreign clients visiting, I'd suggest she take it off. To her, it's just a nice design.

Sure, it's ignorant. But it's benign ignorance. If I let myself get upset at all the example of where "my" culture is misused or misinterpreted, but where there's no evidence of malice, I'd be no fun to be around.

[Tsukemonoki]

I have to agree with Rachel on the issue of non-whites adopting Western wear. European and American colonialism forced their versions of fashion and clothing styles upon the rest of the world. As far as I know, people in East Asia didn't wear suits before the Europeans and Americans came over. So, personally, I think non-whites can wear whatever they want without having to worry about offending the "white majority." Cause really, the whites wanted it that way to begin with.

And as far as I'm concerned, there is no hip hop fashion. And more over, there are plenty of non-African Americans who make/listen to hip hop.

Seriously though, I think oftentimes people have to wear certain kinds of clothing to assimilate or belong. Other times, it is a way to recognize a part of their identity. I have strong doubts that this particular family has strong cultural ties to China nor do they have to wear those costumes to belong... in Boston. So, yes, I think that they are probably wearing "Chinese-style costumes" to "stand out" and get compliments. But hey, I will keep an open-mind. Perhaps next time I see this kind of thing happen, I may go and talk to the potential offenders to figure out context. If they indeed have a strong tie, then fine. If they are simply ignorant, then I'll quickly enlighten them. However, I'm really tired of seeing white people get dressed up whenever they are attending an event that has some tenuous tie to "Asian [I still hate that word] culture."

And for the record, you can read about the history of the Dragon Boat Festival here. No more excuses eliaday.

[Nina]

I personally don't find it offensive *in general*, but I could see being somewhat discomforted by that particular instance that you're describing.

I agree with the other commenters that it is all about context. These folks sounded like they really didn't think this thing through in a sensitive manner. But I don't think it's always inappropriate. I'm going to a wedding this summer (KA woman, white guy) and she wants all the women who have a hanbok to wear it because she wants her culture incorporated into what will largely be a Western wedding, which I think is really cool regardless and perhaps partly because of some non-Korean folks may be wearing one too.

I find nothing wrong with the fact that people find traditional Korean (or other cultures') clothing to be beautiful because, you know, they ARE beautiful. But I think that because they are traditional clothing that represent a culture, they should be treated with respect. They shouldn't just be worn because you want to look cool or exotic, but because you have some connection to the culture.

That said, I've also heard some critiques of fashion trends that incorporate Asian elements. I think that this also, when done tastefully and not in a "hey I'm a geisha!" way is actually really cool. Hanboks are absolutely gorgeous pieces of clothing. It's just that most white designers, unfortunately, are probably going to look at Asian clothing and think about how "exotic" and "sexy" they look. But...perhaps not.

[jstele]

I'm very surprised by many of the comments on this thread. I would think that being a minority or being in a mixed relationship would make one more open-minded and sensitive to other people.

How do you know the white family's intentions were negative? Maybe they wore those costumes to take part in the festivities or make themselves feel like they were part of them. It is not anyone's place to give them a look or confront them about their dress.

As long as people wear the clothes respectfully, I see nothing wrong with them wearing the costumes. Don't be too quick to judge other people.

[girdtmom]

Hi. Delurking after long readership to say that I guess I'm really more clueless than I realized. I could so easily have been that offensive poseur. If I'd decided to hoof it in the 36 miles in from Metrowest to Cambridge for the festival. And I might very well have decided to dress my daughter in the brand new cheongsam that she was given for her third birthday last week. Because I think it looks cute on her. And, really, where else is she going to wear it? But it seems that that could have been thoughtless and obnoxious. Because I don't look especially like I'm half Chinese. And my daughter has her father's blue eyes. With wavy brown hair highlighted red courtesy of her paternal grandfather. So that cheongsam, while cute, certainly looks like a costume. One that I would certainly feel too self-conscious to wear. I don't feel "Chinese enough" to risk dressing so conspicuously (I didn't absorb too much Chinese culture growing up in the north Atlanta suburbs in the 70s). But it would never have occurred to me that it would be offensive to dress my toddler daughter that way. I probably won't do it now if the occasion arises. But it makes me sad. As if she's been excluded from a club that she didn't even know was there.

[Rachel aka Weigook Saram]

An aside, this topic reminded me of a really funny post by Amber at American Family:

http://american-family.org/2007/04/20/honoring-her-culture/

[rhelly]

i agree with jstele. i too am very shocked by these comments. i think people shouldn't needlessly worry about what others are wearing as opposed to DOING. i have yet to see anyone maliciously wear a hanbok or other asian dress. ignorance maybe, maliciously no.

i am a korean american married to a wonderful scottish man, i have to agree with girdtmom, that by reading these i am saddened by the fact that my intention of dressing my newborn son in a 100 day hanbok to celebrate his 100 day might be offensive because i was adopted and have no "authentic" base. or the fact that i gave him the korean word 'tae' for a middle name might be taken as offensive as well. but still, i'm going to celebrate anyway, because it's important to me.

and i disagree with tsukemonoki, i don't believe the "whites" forced their culture. it's not like they said "wear jeans and a tshirt or die" did they? its like when my clients say "they forced me to drink". everyone has a choice. rather, i think it's today's society (in all cultures) appears to have lost its sense of heritage, tradition, and family. we should talk about that as the real sadness.

[eliaday]

i think there is a very slippery slope here.

i think weddings are a different case - they're not every day sorts of events, and people where things at weddings that they would never wear in any other context. i think weddings are unique opportunities for performing culture and for allowing culture to evolve.

i think it is different if you are participating in an active way in a tradition - being part of a wedding, celebrating a dol.

i also think that the fact that people think it's so exciting or cool to wear "asian" clothing speaks to the way that "asian" is viewed in america. i feel like it perpetuates a perception of asian as exotic or foreign. i am neither exotic nor foreign.

i know it's a really slippery slope, but i think it's something to continue to think about. i think a lot about what asian american culture is, and how i can pass this along to my asian american daughter. i know that for us, culture is something that evolves as we live as people of asian descent in america. i want raise my daughter to be empowered in how she views her asian american identity, not ashamed, objectified, awkward, or uncomfortable.

[Carole in Korea]

"i also think that the fact that people think it's so exciting or cool to wear "asian" clothing speaks to the way that "asian" is viewed in america. i feel like it perpetuates a perception of asian as exotic or foreign. i am neither exotic nor foreign. "

Maybe as it becomes more common, it'll be less "exotic". But then it loses a part of its "specialness".

As for "western culture", because it's been adopted in so many places, there's no longer any "proprietary" western culture to speak of. Everyone owns it. Just like every culture now owns spaghetti, pizza, nachos, whisky and (increasingly) sushi. If "real" Italians walked into the supermarket and strongly advised you to not buy that abomination of a frozen pizza, you'd think they were nuts. But pizza was "exotic" 50 years ago. Fashion goes in similar waves - in the quest for newness, things get absorbed.

Obscure = "exotic". Common = mundane. It's the punishment that comes with success. I still think that Korean and other Asian cultures have a lot to give the world, (and I'll promote them - it's part of my job) but I'll feel a little sad when I take my redneck friends to a Korean restaurant in North America and they look at me like I'm an idiot because I explain that they have to stir the bibimbap.

[katie]

The matching family sounds particularly cringe-worthy, but I also think the most offensive thing about them is that they were a family wearing matching outfits. *Shudder*

Being hapa, part of me cringes in horror and another part of me is burning with jealousy when I see someone else dressed in traditional dress. I love how comfortable and elegant my hanbok feels and I find the cut of a cheongsam extremely flattering, but you would never catching me wear either if I can help it. As a teenager and a young adult trying out styles or being dragged to cultural events, I hated the eye-rolling from the Asian American kids and the comments from white friends: "Oh, you just look sooooo Asian!"; "What *is* your mix anyway?". It makes me feel sad that I can't wear cuts of shirts and dresses that are so flattering to my face and figure or bring out my single most expensive, luxurious dress without a lurch of dread. If it were truly up to me, I'd wear my hanbok tomorrow, a sari the next day, a cheongsam the next, and get all done up in a kimono for a party.

Yoga pants and tank tops, of course, the rest of the time. All that dressing up is exhausting.

[Gloria]

I always find it a bit odd for people to wear ethnic costumes to attend some sort of cultural event. It's one thing to wear it when you are performing something to share the culture, but just as an attendee? It's totally weird.

For instance, my chinese dance group was invited to a private school's fundraiser event that had a Chinese theme. It was really cheesy to say the least, with food catered from Panda Express (wow, that's authentic right there man!), and faux-calligraphy scrolls written by the supposed Mandarin teacher. The part that got to me was people wearing costumes other than qipaos. With qipaos, I excuse it as a fashionable dress with a twist. But there were people wearing things I really thought they found at some bad Halloween costume shop. The WORST costume I saw was a caucasian men dressed in a Vietnamese peasant's clothe finished with the pointy straw hat. The whole thing was characteristically Vietnamese, my fellow dancers and I couldn't stop snickering. I tried sooo hard not to express my disdain through the event since we were getting paid for this, and they people at the school were extremely nice, but COME ON!!!! If this is how the teachers and parents view Chinese culture, then what are they going to teach the students?

I tried my best to introduce some authentic Chinese culture through my dances, which included 1 Han folk dance, 1 royal court dance from the Tang dynasty, and 1 Mongolian dance. I think we were the most authentic part of the whole night, except only about 10 people actually paid attention to us. =(

[Kyong]

Carole in Korea - I always love reading your comments. You're so right about the evolution of "exotic" to "common" once something is co-opted. Also, it's interesting when a twist occurs like kimchi burgers & cheesey, greasy slices of American pizza (so not authentic Italian), anything fusion...with clothing, nehru collared tunics (it wasn't just the Beatles who liked them - a co-worker's husband got married in one back in the 70s, and they're a very conservative, baby-boomer, non-hippie couple), and cheongsams on every celebutante on the planet. I suppose then the end result is something that is nowhere close to the inspiration, and it's become trendy and not very reverential to the original culture. Ah, fashion.

My Russian sister-in-law loves wearing her hanbok bc she feels it's like wearing a wedding dress. There is a feeling of "occasion" when wearing it. She also gave me daughter some lovely traditional Russian tunics when she was a toddler.

To echo many of the commenters, it's all about context. I'm guessing that the family eliday saw was trying in their own way to celebrate the "occasion" but came off as gimmicky & dorky. Yeah, matching outfits in any variety is really cringe-inducing.

[Kirsty]

My husband is Indian, and I usually wore Indian clothing to any nice Indian event we were invited to while living in England, for two main reasons:

- I just didn't have any nice enough Western-style dresses, and no money to buy them.

- My husband's mother & aunties urged me repeatedly to wear Indian dress (sari or salwar kameez).

Although I felt just fine when chatting with older ladies/aunties or close younger relatives, I did feel like a wanna-be dork whenever I was near any younger strangers... I could just picture them thinking, "Who does she think she is, that white girl appropriating our clothing?" At one wedding, where there were many strangers, I had to wear a beautiful gold sari that I had worn as part of my own wedding. I felt pretty inaproppriate, but my MIL urged me to wear it, saying that "Biji will be so happy" (Biji was my husband's beloved grandmother). How could I say no? Spare a thought for those of us who may be cringing right along with you, although it's sad to have to cringe in such a beautiful outfit that is making elderly people happy. It would have been humiliating to have strangers coming up to me and quizzing me (subtly?) on my "fitness" to wear it.

[Kate]

First, Carole in Korea, love your comments. Esp. the one on the evolution of exotic to common.

"though my Irish Catholic grandmother would have seriously kicked her ass."

This made me snarf my coffee. My Italian Catholic great grandmother would have done the same. Heck, my Korean Catholic MIL would probably have had something to say.

"Sure, it's ignorant. But it's benign ignorance."

Right, motivation has to be considered. And I think (a few people have touched on it in this thread) that interest in a culture not your own is almost always a good thing. If you're learning about the way other people live you're going to be more tolerant, curious and willing to see that the "other" is really a lot like you.

[Katie]

Hi all -

I don't think that anyone is saying that there is no occasion for other than people-of-that-country to wear national or ethnic garb. But let's not decontextualize this from our world history of colonialism. These two things can coexist. They sit uneasily on paper, but that's the wonderful thing about life - all kinds of strange alchemies succeed. My hanbok sits in a closet, but dammit, I'll wear it if and when I want. Would I be comfortable with my White dad in chogori? No way. But that's also because he has no desire to learn about Korean culture. I'd feel alot different about the desire of a White friend that was really respectful and interested, though that still might not sway me.

I think my point is just that no one here seems to be asserting that there's NO space for someone who's not Korean from Korea to wear a hanbok (for example). To me, it's just that the space is a political one, one not to be explored without uncertainty and reflection and a knowledge of history. White American and European cultures seem to need to melt other cultures down to make grease for their wheels. I would feel angry, and I think justifiably so, to see a White family wear what they thought was traditional Chinese clothing to appropriate some of the "exotic" flavor of the country in question. But essentialism over who "owns" Chinese-ness is not the answer either, you know?

[Zoe]

Great discussion; thanks for the provocative post! When I see non-Asians dressed in so-called "Asian" clothing, depending on the context, I may find it tacky, though I wouldn't say offensive. I'm curious about the type of clothing worn by the family whom Eliaday saw--were they clothes that are truly Chinese or were they of the fake Chinese (what Resist Racism refers to as "China-lite") variety--you know, kind of like the clothing version of chinoserie and something that no Chinese person in China would ever wear?

The thing is, in China, Han Chinese (the ethnic majority) get a kick out of visiting "minority" parks and dressing up in costumes of non-Han minorities and posing for photos. When I was in China, friends tried to get me to do this as well, but it just didn't feel right to me, especially given the inequalities between the Han and non-Han peoples. I'm not sure if this is also a trend in other Asian countries. I recently attended a lecture by a white professor of Chinese history who wore a Chinese-looking shirt and while I found it tacky, my Chinese (from China)colleagues marveled at how "exotic" she looked and said they have no problem with non-Asians wearing this type of clothing; in fact, they are fans of it.

I wonder if many Asian Americans (for the record, I am hapa) view this matter differently than people from Asia because for some of us, we have to endure being exotified, orientalized, and defending our "Americanness" on a regular basis. At least, this is how I feel when I see these types of costumes worn outside their proper context (ie, weddings or special ceremonies) or when people wear fake Asian clothing--to me, it reinforces the notion of difference and perpetuates some sort of Asian mystique.

That said, in certain situations as mentioned above, I don't find it inappropriate for non-Asians to dress in kimono, saris, qipao, hanbok, etc, especially if it's an event where most people are dressed in that way. My Caucasian friend wore a qipao for part of her wedding ceremony to please her Chinese parents-in-law, and I thought she looked stunning, though she claimed to feel highly uncomfortable and feared guests would think she was trying to appropriate a culture that isn't hers. As for the family Eliaday saw, who knows what their connection to China/Taiwan/HK is--I think it's dangerous for us to assume they wore those clothes with the intention of drawing attention to themselves. Perhaps the clothing was a gift from someone and this is the only occasion they felt it appropriate to wear it. I still find it tacky, but offensive, no, and I would never say anything to them, nor would I give them dirty looks--that's just rude, and who are we to dictate what people can and cannot wear? I wonder though if that family looked around and noticed that the *Asians* in the crowd weren't dressed in Chinese-style clothing (or were there some who were?) and felt embarrassed.

Now, if that family had approached Eliaday or other Asian American attendees and told them they should be wearing Chinese clothing because of their heritage, that would be highly offensive.

[Zoe]

A follow-up to my above comment:

In my last sentence, when I say that it would be highly offensive if the tacky China-Lite-clothed family told Asian Americans that they should be similarly dressed, I didn't mean to imply that Eliaday or anyone else should only feel offended under those circumstances. I totally understand why people would find the sight of people seemingly appropriating and exotifying someone else's culture as offensive, but I just happen to find it in poor taste more than anything. I don't want to discount anyone else's right to feel offended though.

[carolie]

How do you know when people are wearing "costumes" that they aren't entitled to?

I'm blonde with hazel eyes and pale, pink, freckled skin. Looking at me, you'd never guess that along with a bunch of Western European ancestors, I have Italian ancestors, African ancestors, and Japanese ancestors. Though I don't have a tattoo, I might choose to do so, and by looking at me, you'd never guess that I read hiragana, katakana and some kanji.

So would you judge me if I were to wear clothing traditional to one of those three ethnic backgrounds? If you saw me in public in a kimono, you might sneer to yourself that I had no right to appropriate another's culture. Where do you draw the line? I can't wear a kimono unless I am at least 1/2 Japanese? 1/4? 1/8? In order to avoid censure, do I need to wear a sign with my traditional Italian garb, showing my family tree?

According to these comments, if I had a kanji tattoo, many of you would assume I was some stupid white girl with no idea what I'd had written on my body....and you'd be wrong (at least about whether or not I could read my tattoo...I still might be stupid, white and a girl...ha ha!)

As for "showing off" and wearing clothing just to "get attention"...what about those women who wear blouses exposing the entire top/sides of their breasts, or mini skirts showing a lot of leg, or high heeled shoes (which are very specifically to look good and not for comfort)? Isn't that dressing to "get attention"?

Yes, I sigh and roll my eyes when I walk past the "gangsta" store where the youth hang out in our local arcade...the sight of skinny Japanese kids with backwards caps and baggy pants falling off their asses, posturing in front of the jet matte black mannequins makes me laugh. But I'm not offended that they are "trying to appropriate another culture." If that were the case, I would have to be offended when I see so many Japanese people around me wearing clothing with English words that make no sense, or with English words that are actually vulgar (I actually saw a five year old child wearing a sequin-accented t-shirt that said "Sperm Receptacle"! I was offended, not so much by her wearing it, but that anyone would sell such a thing, especially in a child's size!) I would have to be offended by the Japanese mania for all things Mickey Mouse ("Hey, he's OUR cultural icon! How dare you!")

Instead, I just think they look silly, much as, I'm sure, anyone might giggle at me in a kimono...not because I'm blonde and look so white, but because I'm short and fat and look like a barrel wrapped in fabric.

I'm not offended when my Japanese friend asks me if "all Christians talk to the priest in that little wooden closet," assuming we're all traditional Catholics, or that her students believe Americans eat hamburgers for breakfast, lunch and dinner (as many Americans seem to think the Japanese eat nothing but raw fish and rice). Instead, when I have the chance, I try to educate others, much as they've educated me about many of my misconceptions about the Japanese culture...and when I don't have the chance, I chalk it up to ignoranee, not malice, and go on with my daily life.

[carolie]

Sincere apologies for such a long comment...I didn't realize it had gotten so long, and didn't mean to hijack!

[halfmama]

Hmm... these comments are all really interesting to me. I'm not sure if I read that anyone actually finds this offensive per se (please correct me if I'm wrong), but the general consensus seems to be that it needs to be taken in context.

In my previous comment, I wrote that I find it totally disrespectful. Maybe those words were extreme, but what I meant was that I don't find it disrespectful in an offensive way, but in a way that takes away from the actual event and tries to call attention to oneself. Like if I were to show up to your wedding wearing a long, white dress. Not offensive, but just... well, selfish.

That being said, after reading all your comments I realized that I probably am too quick to draw to a conclusion that may not be fair. I think, speaking only for myself, I've met so many 'weird' Asianphiles that I am immediately on guard about who is obsessed with a culture that has nothing to do with them (usually, I hate to say, men who love Asian women), and this is unfair to the people who have actual ties and real respect for the culture. So I apologize.

This is what I love about KMs. Thanks for keeping this a calm and mature 'discussion.' It's nice to see that everyone feels comfortable enough to add their opinions and realize if said in a non-flammatory manner, it will be read and hopefully, we'll all learn from ieach other!

[JaeRan]

"i don't believe the "whites" forced their culture. it's not like they said "wear jeans and a tshirt or die" did they? its like when my clients say "they forced me to drink". everyone has a choice."

I found this statement to be totally offensive and completely overlooking the history of colonialism. An individual saying "someone made me drink" is NOT the same as a country occupying a country and taking over all the political, structural and social institutions and forcing them to adhere to the occupying country's culture.

It's hard to distinguish between the lines of appreciation and appropriation. Do I think Gwen Stefani was being racist when she wore a bindi and seemed to absorb herself in Hindi culture? Well, on the surface I had a hard time with it until I learned that her boyfriend is Indian and she was close to his family. So maybe I thought she exploited it a little to be "unique" but I didn't equate it to the same level of stupidity that I now see her objectifying and using the Harajuku girls as back up props.

As others have said before, there are many different contexts to be sensitive to, and my personal gripe is the sense of entitlement that it's okay to appropriate another culture (when it becomes more about ojectification than a true desire to connect with a culture, community or person).

[Summer]

I am at odds on how to answer here, clothing is definitely traditional and utilitarian for me...

Being Native American, there are utilitartian clothing that I wouldn't mind seeing more widespread, such as kuspuks or a Chahta (Choctaw) apron, or even lace beadwork, and I would love to be able to wear some slippers (Inupiaq or Athabascan), because I find them so comfortable, in the wearing and the memories, and as part of a culture that is dying out, the more you wear them the more you remember....but then, you do have to be careful not to bastardize it either... such as in some western/southwestern tribes, you MUST have permission to wear a certain style of dress, certain dress styles are not utilitatarian, they are religious..

Even in Korea, for some halmoni and haraboje, the hanbok is utilitarian, not just for special occasion...
I own two traditional hanboks, and two modern day ones...and yes, I do feel more beautiful in a traditional one, they were created to enhance a woman's beauty, I do feel they should be worn more often, such as to church *as one halmoni at my church does, she rotates between a traditional and a modern day*...

I do believe that there are definitely clothing that can be worn in appreciation of a culture, regardless of race, and that it can be appropriate in context..as to your incident above, maybe so...it was a celebration?

I love the t-shirt hyperlink, I gotta make one for myself...I swear I must be the only NDN in USA that is stopped to receive comment "you speak good English."

[Majong]

I am Chinese American and growing up my parents were very involved in our local Chinese community. It was not unusual for adults and children to be dressed in Chinese-inspired clothing. I'm guessing probably the same as the clothes worn by this white family at the dragon boat race- not real silk, bright colors, frog closures down the center, etc. (You actually do find these outfits in China, in local retail shops....but generally locals wear the thick-padded jackets, styled similarly just not in the fake silk version.) I still find this to be the case going to Chinese-oriented festivities. I personally don't think this is negative at all. All groups do this to celebrate their heritage- and often ethnic garb is an integral part of that celebration. I also want to add that I do have one friend that comes to mind that was born and raised in India. He's pale pale pale with red hair and freckles. He frequently wears indian clothing because it's what he grew up wearing but gets ridiculed all the time for it from people who don't know him. If ethnic clothing is worn to demean or make fun of people and their culture, then that's a different story.

[Liza]

Hi -- I'm a first time visitor by way of Rice Daddies, by way of Motherhood Uncensored. You are so getting bookmarked.

As a 3rd generation German-American, I found this discussion very interesting. I was trotted out in dirndls from when I could walk until I was a teenager and could refuse. It also reminds me of all the crazy plaid clothing you sometimes see at Scottish festivals.

Personally, I'd feel like an idiot dressing in someone else's ethnic traditional clothing, especially if I didn't have a connection to it or the confidence that I was wearing it appropriately. In fact, someone (white and English) once gave me a lovely salwar kameez, which I never wore. I tried it on a few times, but every time I imagined wearing it out, I felt silly.

[Wo bu gaosu ni wo de mingzi]

How is there anything offensive about that? Chinese people don't wear traditional clothes on a regular basis anymore, but it's not to say it's never worn. Further more, the Dragon Boat Race is a traditional event... why not wear traditional clothes? The Qipao or "Cheongsam" comes from the Manchus anyway, it isn't Chinese.
The modern western suit actually comes from Central Asia, that's the style of clothes the Mongols and other Turkic tribes wore long ago. In Europe, they did not wear pants, underwear, jackets, vests, or any of that. That was introduced by Huns and other tribes when they invaded Europe.

What's "political" about clothes? You're the one saying "Chinesey" which isn't a word. It is how Chinese people dress, just not on a day to day basis.

I bet you've never been to China ever. The West is just as "exotified" there, even more so. The Chinese would be in awe to see a foreigner and stare at him, yet the opposite would not happen in the US with a white person seeing an Asian. You can think about that.

[Katie]

I don't see anything wrong with it. I would take it as acompliment that someone wanted to wear the traditional clothing of my country.(I am Filipina, married to a Korean and raised in Canada) I love saris and wera them when there are festivals here. The East Indians love it and take it as a form of flattery( I add that my sister in law is half East Indian.My husband wears a barong tagalog to our family weddings and I wear a hanbok for ceremonies and Korean holidays. My children have all three, the only one missing is Spanish(of which I am also descended from). In this multicultural world, what is the problem if someone likes our clothing enough to wear it on a special occasion. If you don't want them caucasians wearing traditional clothing, may I suggest not wearing jenas and a t-shirt....oh and my children also dress up for stampede!