They're all lost in the supermarket

When I shop at my friendly local Super H-Mart, as is my wont on lazy Sunday afternoons, I always notice the non-Asian patrons. Not all, but the ones that sloooowly wander the aisles with an expression of absolute bewilderment. Like they are in a dream world of some sort, or mirrored fun-house. They innocently look for ice cream, only to be met with something called mochi and red bean popsicles, or instant noodles and are awash in a red sea of shiny Shin-ramyun packages. "Oh honey ... this box says it's chicken cal-GUCK-sue? Is that like alfredo or something?" And you might hear a child's voice off in the distance, by the deli: "EWWWWWWW!!! These are OCTOPUS LEGS!!!!"

If H-Mart hasn't hit your neck of the woods yet, it's a Korean grocery chain, prevalent on the coasts and starting to emerge in middle America. It's much bigger in size and selection than the smaller mom-and-pop operations I've grown up with - the one near me took over what used to be a Jewel (that's Albertson's in other parts of the country), so it's pretty sizable. On an economic side-note - I wonder how H-Mart's arrival will impact said mom-and-pops ...

I can sympathize with this fish out of water feeling in this country, but at least I'm fluent in the language! I can imagine the conversation, five minutes prior in the car, perhaps driving back from a long weekend in Wisconsin. "Oh look, Herb, there's a grocery over there. That big 'H-Mart'. We're out of eggs, and Capri-Suns for the kids ' lunches tomorrow, let's run in before everything closes." And so they park their Dodge Caravan and go in. And they silently notice (picture thought bubbles over their heads), "All the cashiers are Asian. Hm. Interesting. So is customer service. And so are ... all ... the ... customers. Uh oh." But, they stay and shop, maybe because they feel it would be rude to just leave, and out of their sincere need for groceries. There are plenty of "typical" grocery items, right alongside the frozen fish cakes and baskets of kong-namul, so it's not like you can't do your usual grocery shopping. Perhaps they stay out of pure curiosity, too. There is some cool stuff in there.

I can't help but feel mildly amused - but not with maliciousness, more in an "oh, poor unwitting people" kind of way. This is less likely to happen in the smaller Korean groceries, since it's more obvious on the outside that they are Korean stores, or the sign actually says "KOREAN GROCERY." So the only people who would bother to go in know what the heck is going on. (That reminds me, does anyone remember the Korean restaurant in Chicago that was actually called "Korean Restaurant"? Too bad it closed down, it was open 24 hours!)

Hopefully this scene is less common on the coasts, where (I hope) Korean and Asian groceries and stores are more part of the mainstream tapestry of everyday life.  But, out where I live, I would say that we're not so integrated, even though it seems like I see more and more Koreans and Asians every time I'm out and about. I personally love going to the Korean grocery, not just to buy my K-supplies and fixin's and check out what's new in Korean food storage technology, but just to see other Korean people. It feels good to be greeted with a bright and smiley "ahn-yunghasaeyooooh!", and reciprocate a quick head bow and pretend like I know what the cashier is saying when she relays the total in Korean. They figure out pretty quickly that I don't speak Korean. I know it's so superficial, but it's nice to be acknowledged simply on the merit of being Korean. Just walking in and being me. My face, the genes my parents passed down to me, are my lifetime membership card. And, where the hell else am I going to find bulk boxes of Chapaghetti and cans of yummy Bon Bon?? Grape, please.

I hope by the time my son is able to notice the difference between himself and others, and some kid says incredulously, "Ewwww! SHRIMP-flavored chips???", the mom or dad will just say, "What, haven't you seen those before? They're good. Come on, if you sit still for five more minutes, I'll buy you some Botan rice candy." And just keep on shopping.

-- Carol

Comments

[Swan]

Ah, so that's what H-mart is.

On the 5 shelves dedicated to all things Asian in my local Safeway, they do carry Shrimp Flavored Chips. But they don't carry Sapporo Ichiban, so I'm off to the local mom & pop places or Ranch 99 or LeeLee's.

I do confess when I see folks who aren't Asian in my K-grocery, I surreptitiously stare while playing it off by staring really, really intently into some picked up banchan, like I'm searching for the meaning of life or something. Then I wonder a) did they really mean to be here? or b) maybe they spent time in Korea? or c) those kids are gonna be really disappointed when they figure out they don't carry Yu-Gi-Oh cards here.

[jessabean]

There is an H-mart out in my neck of the woods, in "Korea-town." The first time I went there, I wandered around in amazement as well. Because who KNEW that you could dedicate an entire AISLE to just soy sauce??? There were so many choices for everything!

[Lil]

I have lived in Korea for a total almost 7 years. Count me in as one of those that will visit Asian supermarkets when I live in the States... but not to look at things in bewilderment... but to get my supply of gochujang, samjang, 2% peach water, aloe water, kim, korean soy sauce (can't stand the japanese stuff, etc. =) And my Korean friends say my pronunciation is near perfect since I can read and write Korean. I actually worry moving back to the states cuz I can't imagine life without my daily hitch of Korean food. I plan on being there so I can continue making denjang chigae, kimchi etc........... pure bliss!

It is funny cuz when I wander in Korea in my mind I really feel like I belong. But when I pass a mirror it is then I realize that my belonging is short lived cuz I look so different. =) No matter tho... I still love it and I DO belong!

[Harmony]

Swan: I get that stare all the time. :-)

There's an H-Mart right by my parents' house - about an hour from where I live - and that's not so awkward. A lot of local non-Asians know that H-Mart has good prices on produce and seafood, so I don't stand out as much (until I get to the checkout counter with my 'exotic' food, or until I say something in Korean). But the Korean store 'near' our house (20 or 30 minutes away) is a small mom and pop store with no prominent English writing on the outside of the building - only a big sign that says 동방식품. So you can imagine that when I go there I really stand out. But everyone's always very nice to me, even if it is clear that they're wondering what in the world brought me into that store. And of course, sometimes they ask. If there's one Korean phrase I've said more than any other, it's "oori nampyun-ee hanguk saram-yehyo"

I will admit to wondering what the *other* non-Koreans are doing there. Are they married to (or dating) a Korean like I am? Did they ever visit Korea? Or did they just happen in there by accident?

[Angie in Texas]

my parents own a mom-and-pop shop, but there's no real threat (yet?) of an Hmart coming here. there was an article in the paper a few years back that addressed ethinic groceries here in san antonio. i think the writers hit it right on when they talked about how it's more than just about the groceries, but about connecting, like you said, on some basic level but also about being able to use your native language, get the local gossip, and get the paper/news in your own language.

[beloved]

H-Mart is awesome. I like to plan my vacations so that I'll be near one. haha.

And I'm with Harmony--I also always feel the need to declare my marriage to a Korean whenever I get the odd looks in Korean marts. Actually, that was one of my most common phrases while living in Korea, too. It Koreanizes me and gives me some credibility. Kind of sucks, but whatever.

I don't marvel at much in the Korean markets (aside from new products that come out that I never saw in Korea before), but I'm sure I look similar to those non-Asians you're talking about when I go to my local Vietnamese market. They carry some Korean stuff, but it's mostly Vietnamese. I love to look at everything and try to figure out if I could cook something with it. I get funny looks and like someone else mentioned, I'm also always trying to figure out what the other non-Asians are doing there.

[kim]

I could LIVE in our Super H! The cafe is particularly delish although I'm bummed that they no longer make paht bing soo. I also love that ours has several mom-n-pop booths inside for fresh prepared goods (bakery, chicken, rice baang and roasted seaweed, etc.).

Btw, ours is always a giant melting pot of ethnicities, with fewer lost faces wandering the aisles. Heck, most of my local (non-Asian) moms group shops there for produce! You should come visit ours sometime, Carol. ;-)

[Kate C.]

Beloved and Harmony, right there with you! I totally get the look!

[ChineseCanuck]

I guess H-Mart is a little like T&T (http://www.tnt-supermarket.com/main-e.php) in Canada, a "real" supermarket, rather than an Asian grocery (places that many Canadian born Asians won't go into, even if paid $10,000,000+). I've noticed lots of white people at a location in downtown Toronto, as well as one in a shopping mall at a predominantly Jewish neighbourhood, but not necessarily the other two locations, which are in areas where lots of Asian people live.

Doesn't sound like people in your town are all that sophisticated. Octopus legs/squid isn't only an Asian thing. Haven't they heard of calamari?

My parents pretty much use T&T for produce and Asian snacks. When I move out, I'll probably use it for produce only. I'm not a big snacker, let alone Asian snacks (I don't even like Pocky!)

[Rachel]

Funny, because there are never many non-Koreans in the Korean supermarkets down here, even the big ones. In fact, I was at Arirang last night and I think I was the only non-Korean in the whole store. I'm sure people wondered what was up as I stood in the lobby for twenty minutes waiting for MIL to buy a pair of shoes. We don't have Super H-Mart, but it sounds awesome.

[Kristen]

In the Northern Virginia H-Marts and similar stores, there are many Indians/South Asians and other more recent immigrants. In addition to the various spices, they seem to congregate around the fresh(er) veggies & fruits than what you'd find at Giant.

[Sarah]

Wow! I am so glad I found this site! I am a half korean new mother of a three month old son. It is funny to read your blog - I can definitely relate. My mother is Korean and perfectly fits the mold. I will be back for sure!

[christina]

When I lived in the suburbs of NYC I was a little dismayed that I had to take a train and subway more than an hour away for good Asian products (Chinatown). Then I discovered a teeny tiny Chinese supermarket (that had a few Japanese and Korean items too) Scarsdale and that first time I walked in I exclaimed loudly "Oh my god, they have char-siu!" People chuckled around me. Now I live in the Bay Area and I am fortunate to live within a couple of miles from 99 Rance, Kukje, Trader Joe's, and Safeway...it really doesn't get any better than this...ok, maybe if Whole Foods was here too, but at least I get the Farmer's Market every Thursday which is better.

[eliaday]

So timely... H-mart is coming to Massachusetts!! I'm actually kind of shocked, it's going to be out in the 'burbs of Boston, in Burlington. But it's such HUGE news... I will be there when it opens. Yum. This is when I really miss living in California.

[Denise]

Dh is Korean so we also go to the local Korean supermarket often, although lately i have been going alone with our two kids during the week instead of the weekend. Sometimes i get strange looks but having 2 kids that look Korean, most of the time i am asked if my husband is Korean (that is IF anyone says anything to me). The current Korean supermarket we go to has a points card (ours is in DH's name) and recently the newly hired Korean teenage boy cashier looked up from reading DH's name on the receipt and said DH's name with a question in his voice. Of course, i just said that is my DH's name. You could see the wheels turning in his head as he finally realized that is why i had a points card (the supermarket just issue them to Korean or Korean Americans).
When my mom was here a few months ago, we visited the market and she said she felt like she had stepped into a whole new world :)

[papa2hapa]

Dang, I miss H-Mart in Virginia. That was an awesome grocery store that even sold Kimchi fridges. I mean, who doesn't need one of those? Plus, they had the best selection of noodles ever.

[Carol]

Wow, so nice to hear from the other perspective! Not sure what I was expecting, but didn't expect to hear from so many of the partners-of :-) You're like the innocent bystanders in my post, and I wouldn't be feeling sorry for you since you actually know what you're looking for in the grocery. But, sorry if that *was* me hiding behind the boxes of apple-pears trying to spy what was in your cart ...

ChineseCanuck: Calamari here is disguised as heavily breaded fritters dipped in marinara sauce, so even though people have some awareness that they're eating octopus, I don't think the masses are used to seeing it in its unprocessed and unfried state. Ah well.

[Asianmommy]

Whenever I see non-Asians wandering around in an Asian grocery store, I always wonder if I should go over there and help them. But then I figure out that maybe they know their way around better than I do! :)

[Rora Seonsaengnim]

Hee hee, "Korean Restaurant" reminds me of the restaurant in Itaewon called simply "Foreign Restaurant." It always cracks me up. They have a great Indian buffet.
ChineseCanuck, I was a HUGE fan of T&T growing up! There was one in Calgary and I used to look forward to going there for weeks. There was just so much to see and look at. I bought some beautiful ceramics there. When I was living in small town rural Nova Scotia I used to get my best friend to mail me Pocky and then I would sell it in the hallways of my dorm. The stuff was worth its weight in gold.

[HCG]

christina -- come back to Westchester sometime. a Kam Sen of all things has been in White Plains for a couple of years, and has pretty much revitalized the dead mall. and that small grocery Chinese store I think you're referring to (I think the one on Central Avenue) -- it's expanded and there's a gianormous bubble tea sign. Unfortunately time can't reverse and Schezwan Flower restaurant will never come back on that strip. And Westchester will never come close to the Bay Area, SoCal, Northern NJ or even Fairfax County, VA in terms of range and breath of supermarket types. Eh.

[Nina]

I'm with Rachel. Even though I'm in LA, I get weird stares nearly every time I'm in a Korean super market. It's also been the main site of my "Oh, YOU'RE Korean?!?!?!" experiences. Argh.

Needless to say, there are very few non-Koreans in the Korean markets in LA. Actually, I've experienced some hostility from the Korean workers there at times. They are always unfailingly nice when I'm with my (full Korean) mom, but when I'm alone (without my Korean-looking baby or full Korean hub) or with my (white) dad, I've had at least a few bad experiences.

My mom could never understand why my dad and I didn't like going to the Korean market by ourselves.

[JustMeC]

There's also the adoptive parent, or soon to be adoptive parent, contingent in there. (Me being one of them) All trying to keep the connection to their child's culture. I never really noticed the stares, but I always am offered help, which now makes a little more sense. I'd love to have an H-mart. Or even a true Korean grocery within easy access. Right now, I have a general small asian grocery I prowl...

[BRash]

I shop at Grand Mart, a competitor of H-Mart here in Northern Virginia, but I love them both. We live in such a Pakistani and Indian rich community that they outnumber the Koreans in the store! We mostly shop for the prices there - because most vegetables are close to half the price of a regular grocery store. But most of the Indians & Pakistanis are there for the produce variety - a lot of south asian recipes call for some WEIRD fruits and vegetables that you'd never be able to find in regular grocery stores.

[ktb]

AHHHH!!! I just went through a regression day and bought myself some Botan rice candy! I hadn't had some in about 10 years, so it was a little surreal to see it written in a post...weird. I love the wrapper that explains in english that the rice wrapper melts in your mouth. Yum...shin ramyun...

[Cat]

I'm with Lil. I'll be looking to shop at H-Mart (thank God they're in Chicago) when we move back to the States. Think they're gonna have to get used to more foreigners in there looking for gochujang, gim, and certain brands of soy sauce.

As much as I sometimes complain about not being able to find Western stuff here (Seoul) it's going to be really hard when we move back and I can't get so many of the things I take for granted here.

There's a shop in our neighborhood where they sell prepared banchan; that's all they sell. And, it's name is 반찬점 (banchan jeom - best Romanizaiton I can do if the Hangul doesn't come through..) And, it just means 'banchan store.' Since my Korean cooking skills are pretty sad, the banchan jeom is my favorite place.

[Cat]

sorry, that should be Romanization above. Can't type.

[Cat]

also that "it's" should be "its." sorry. i'll stop now.

[Maureen]

H-Mart is very big here in NJ. My DH and I are big fans, even though we are not Asian. He's an Italian boy who loves his kimchee! I like shopping there because I find the produce and meat/seafood to be better quality. I buy my sons snacks there for school. Also, everyone is usually very helpful and understanding when we fumble over pronunciations! We do get curious looks and often one of us will be asked if our spouse is Korean :)

[Maureen]

I also forgot to add that we are adoptive parents, our son is Korean. We had lots of help from everyone in H-Mart when we planned his dol (tol?).

[Misha]

H-Mart is one of the loves of my life. I am an adopted Korean who lives in the middle of white surburbia in Connecticut. I met my roommate in college who introduced me to my culture via food! She used to live in Fort Lee, NJ which is very close to a Super H Mart so when I came to visit her during the summer, we'd always go and get snacks. There are a few Korean groceries near me now (a Lotte and a little mom and pop place) but when I can't find the groceries I need/want, I just order them from H Mart online.

[Krista]

I'm one of those white people! I go there because I have a secret spy-on-Koreans agenda! Ahaha, no, actually because I am too lazy to make my own kimchee, they have a delicious baked good section, good prices on produce, ear-pick things, and soap that doesn't irritate my skin.

[Chris]

This is such an awesome article. And so true!

Us whitey folks used to love running over to the local World Market after school to buy tons of trippy foreign candy, gawk at the three to four aisles of noodles, and dare each other to drink from bottles with nothing but some vague cartoon or fruit-looking object on the label.

Of course everything smelled like fish and everyone gave us weird glances, but those were simpler times and we had to make do with what little entertainment we could find.

It's good to know that you are entertained as much as we were! The world is such an interesting place when you try something different.

[kc]

I live in LA and I never knew what H-mart was until this post. Go figure. They don't have a location in K-town it seems but there is one in DB. But I go to the Korean market all the time and whenever I see non-Koreans I always wonder what they're buying. I have had people ask me what to buy on more than one occasion though. It seems Korean food is more popular than realized.

[Multicultural Mama]

I discovered the H-Mart outside of Chicago and love it. I've found everything from Bento Boxes to the dried mango my kids devour that you can't find anywhere else. I'm sure I get some odd look, especially when I'm with the kids--pictures of them on my blog--Multiculturalmama--as one looks Asian and the other doesn't. The people that work there are always really friendly and kind--not the grumps you usually get at the local grocery store.

We have a great time trying the different foods they have for sampling and it gives the kids a little bit of a view into something they don't get in Chicago very often. And of course, we come home with all sorts of treats ranging from pot stickers to fried squid and onion chips. Yum!

[Ed]

I feel comfortable in any sort of Asian supermarket - there's no H-Mart here in San Diego, but there is the SoCal Zion supermarket chain.

Anyway, all the Korean, Japanese, and Chinese supermarkets I've been to have been pretty tame compared to one of the Filipino supermarkets I know of in San Diego. This supermarket is famous/notorious for their seafood cleaning service counter - you drop off your fish and you take your number. OK, good enough so far.

However, when you pick your order up, the announcer adds something rather unusual - if you're a woman, he would say something like, "Number porty-six, number porty-six, tank you, you are soooo byootipul today, hab a nice day..." If you're a guy, this same announcer would go, "Number twenty-three, your order is ready, tank you lubber boyyy, hab a nice day..." It freaks newcomers out - but it's a long established inside joke, so to speak.

[Jess]

I confess to making a fool of myself under similar circumstances. I was out with a Filipino friend and his 9 year old daughter and he took me to an H-mart becuase he was going to make korean short ribs and I remember grabbing some squid legs or octopus legs or something to show his daughter and her total non reaction to my "hey this is so weird" made me realize I acting like an ignorant fool. I'm glad I had that realization.

[Ike]

Don't worry so much about finding foods weird. The "hey this is so weird" thing strikes my family a lot too, whether we're shopping in Asian groceries or traditional American ones. At the American grocery near where I went to high school, they sold packaged sheep heads. My mom always joked about buying one, boiling the meat off, and saving the skull as a decorative piece. About a month ago, my cousin and my aunt insisted that they saw a package of tarantulas for sale at the local Asian grocery in Austin. They took me there the next week, and upon further inspection, the "spiders" were just black crabs. How disappointing.