Kimchi Mamas

Korean School

A guest post by Christine Yum Lenz from Small Town Girl Grows Up.

"A, ya. Uh, yuh. Oh, yoh." I heard my daughter practicing her Korean vowels in the dining room.  Three weeks ago, she started Korean school near our home in Silicon Valley.  I've always wanted to be fluent in my mother tongue but never got past restaurant-level Korean.  My parents chose not to make me speak it at home perhaps to not confuse me.  I developed my own blend of Konglish featuring a colorful array of slang and swear words (thanks Dad!) through home osmosis and Korean classes.  On my first visit to Korea at age 12, I nodded silently at my grandparents while they uttered simple sentences about not eating too much or how I looked like my father, limited by my language comprehension to address any deeper topic.  I felt foolish sounding like a 5 year old so I generally didn't speak that much.  During my second visit to Korea several years later, I endured verbal abuse from taxi drivers who chastised me for not knowing my "own" language and teasing from my cousins.  Remembering these experiences, I became determined to give my daughter the opportunity to learn Korean. 

On our first day of school, I marvelled at the sheer quantity of Korean kids - 700 in all - little black-haired heads bobbing around the large high school campus.  I felt at home and self-conscious at the same time.  Most of the other parents were recent immigrants and spoke only Korean.  I definitely felt out of place but as I gripped my daughter's hand and looked for her classroom, I became more determined to "take" our place in this community.  I saw only one or two Caucasian parents so my 6'3" tall husband stuck out a bit but it really didn't bother me.  I was focused on my daughter and how she was handling herself.  I wondered if she knew that she looked different.  She seemed nervous and shy but also curious about these rambunctious kids who were speaking a language that she heard her mom and halmoni speak.  The class was comprised mostly of Korean kids including one little fellow who promptly told me that he was 4 years old. I watched him take out his little pencil case and start lining up his erasers.  I noticed a few hapa kids with their parents and felt small sense of relief knowing that there were others who felt a little out of their element.  The teacher was very kind and addressed everyone in English while explaining the curriculum.  I said goodbye to Sophie and left with a hopeful feeling.

Sophie going to Korean school has brought back a lot of memories of my own Korean classes which were taught in our church basement in the late '70s.  My parents were recruited to teach the classes - to my great embarrassment - along with several parent volunteers.  My dad was an old-school, you-will-obey-me-now-not-later, 1950s style teacher.  He pounded tables with rulers and even flagpoles (watch out front row!) to get everyone's attention and make his point.  My friends, Grace and Becky, reminded me that he broke several rulers throughout the course of our class.  Despite all the theatrics in the classroom, I learned how to "read" Korean (mainly by sounding out words) and could understand my parents' conversations pretty well but not a KBS news show.

Now when I do homework with my daughter, I find that I need to speak Korean albeit poorly to support her lessons.  At 40, I am trying to get over old fears and insecurities.  I also realize that I want my daughter to learn Korean to not turn out like me.  Though I was born in the U.S., I was considered and treated as a "foreigner" because of my looks but I was also treated as an outsider in Korea because of the way I spoke or did not speak.  I hope that by giving my daughter exposure to Korean language and culture that she will gain a sense of ease that I struggle with in my own community.  I also hope that she will gain insight into the Korean people - one half of her heritage - and a fresh way of looking at the world.

Christine grew up in Sunnyvale, California and has been blogging about motherhood since 2006.

How to Make (Pretend) Gimbap

Yesterday my daughter and I went to a children's museum in Irvine, where we made "sushi" with construction paper. I thought it would be fun to adapt the project to make pretend gimbap. My daughter was able do most of the work by herself, and we already had everything we needed around the house.

 

You Need

a toilet paper tube

toilet paper

green, brown, yellow, and orange construction paper

glue

rice

 

Adult Work

Cut the tube into gimbap-sized lengths (about two inches.)

Cut a strip of green construction paper to wrap around the tube.

Cut green, brown, and yellow paper into small squares.

 

Kid Work

Glue the green paper around the tube.

Crumple toilet paper and stuff it in the tube. Glue rice on top.

Glue the tiny pieces of construction paper on top of the rice.

 

--Weigook Saram

Unsolicited Advice Alert!

My friends and acquaintances everywhere are popping out progeny lately, and for some unknown reason these poor people are asking me for tips.  I normally defer to the experts, since it seems like every hour of pregnancy, from conception to delivery, is covered in grotesque detail in books and websites.  But in my personal experience, knowing when the embryo is the size of a fava bean is nice and all, but actually raising an infant was comparatively full of mystery and peril.  Here is a collection of the advice I wish someone gave me concerning life right after having a baby:

Hungry like a 늑대 . . .

My kids had their first day of school today.  I am sitting in my home office at almost 12 noon, wondering how their first day at their new school is going and if they will like the Americanized doshi-raks I packed them this morning.  (There are no food services at their school so packing lunches is a necessity.)

And since I'm feeling a little nostalgic for Korean comfort food today, too, I think it's Spam and kimchi on my menu for lunch.  ; )

What's in your kids' lunchbox?  What do you like to pack?  What do they eat?

--Angie in Texas is enthusiastic about packing lunches . . . for now.  Ask her how she feels in about 3 weeks.

Musings On Race: How Far We've Come

In light of yesterday’s beer-fest hosted by President Obama to quell racial tensions around the recent arrest of Harvard scholar Henry Louis Gates Jr., I have found my thoughts turning, once again, to race, ethnicity, and identity. This morning I listened to a call-in show on my San Francisco NPR station wherein this topic was addressed. Specifically, listeners were invited to share their thoughts on the Gates arrest and its aftermath, which President Obama says is a "teachable moment" on race in America. One caller on the show observed that her young child seemed to have no concept of race – that she had school friends of all colors, and based her decision on whether or not to befriend someone on their behavior and character, and not on their skin color.

America needs Pororo!

As many of you already know, I'm currently halfway through a year of living in one of the most densely Korean populated areas in the United States.  Seriously.  There are condo complexes around here that are occupied entirely by Koreans.  That's 100%.  I know this for a fact because someone I know just moved into a complex and she says she kicked out the last non-korean family who lived there.  

The downside to this is that the McDonalds and Dennys in the area are filled with lots of loud Korean talk in the morning over coffee, I park my humble Camry in parking lots filled with luxury cars and since I'm usually dressed in non brand clothing and carrying a bag from Target, well let's just say that I get looks that say I need to do better.

BUT, it also means great Korean food everywhere (omg the soondubu and dongchimi kooksoo rocks) not to mention lots of choice in Korean products and entertainment.  Which we have been totally taking advantage of and is probably why suddenly the Little Einstein and Go Diego Go DVDs have slowly been pushed aside to make room for Pororo the Little Penguin.  And what a relief it is.  I actually like watching it.

Pororo is a cartoon about a cute little penguin who dreams of flying and lives in the arctic.  He has several cute and warm hearted friends to keep him company.  The creator, Choi Jong-Il, has actually been featured in Time Magazine for possibly changing the preschool cartoon world.  The episodes share simple stories, usually with some social lesson.  A big part of the success though, seems to be that unlike most Korean children shows, the lead character is not an adult.  Pororo is 4, and acts like a 4 year old would.  It's been translated into multiple languages and currently shown on cartoon networks in 80 different countries.  Not in America though, I have no idea why.

There are DVDs with multiple episodes in either Korean or English.  The English ones have much more simple dialogue because I think they're meant to teach Korean children English (judging by the occasional Konglish.)  But, they're still really enjoyable.

At first I was disappointed a bit by how although the characters spoke Korean, very little of anything else was Korean.  They ate with forks and knives, and none of the set looked Korean.  I guess the makers might have done this on purpose so it wouldn't look out of place anywhere else.  But as I kept watching, I realized I might have judged too quickly.  The lessons taught through story are certainly more Korean than not.  For instance, there's an episode all about keeping one's face and hands clean.  That's a top priority as something to teach for parents in Korea.  Even now my mom makes me and my kids wash our face and hands before going out anywhere, or coming home for anywhere.  But it's not something American parents may feel the need to take a whole episode of a show to teach.

I've look online, and currently you can find DVD sets of Pororo at different sites that sell entertainment products from Korea, BUT make sure to check the region code of the DVD player it needs to be played in.  We are region 1, but the DVDs on those sites state that they sell region 3.  I have found though, that I can change the region code on my computer so it will play region 3 DVDs.  They also sell them at Korean video and DVD stores here, which is where I've been getting ours.  I find that I can play these on our regular DVD player attached to our TV.

I know not everyone is so lucky to live by so many Korean choices, so I'm willing to buy them and ship them to you Kimchi Mamas out there in what I have been calling "true America."  Of course, because the cartoon is not yet on American TV, you can also find episodes of it on Youtube.  But if you need them for a car trip or something, I could get one of those flat rate boxes and fill it with your favorite ramen and some choco pies too.  ^^

-jooliyah 

Kimchi Without the Kimchi

Photo Credit L.A. Times

The L.A. Times reports that Kim Soon-ja of South Korea has invented odorless, freeze-dried kimchi.  I'm no fan of kimchi breath or kimchi-flavored butter, but odorless kimchi sounds like an oxymoron to me. I'll stick to the stinky stuff, thank you.

In other food news, it turns out my daughter's addiction to dried seaweed is actually a good thing. If it were up to her, she would eat nothing but rice and gim at every meal. According to this article from Yahoo Health, seaweed is full of potassium and calcium. Who knew?

--Weigook Saram

Kid-Friendly Jeju Island

Jeju Island is the honeymoon capital of Korea and therefore "kid-friendly" doesn't immediately come to mind, but my family and I recently had the opportunity to spend a few days there while my dad (who was turning 60) and his extended family golfed the days away.  So the four of us (including our 5-year-old and 2-year-old), along with my sister and cousin, were given a guide and a tourbus, free to roam the island as we wished.  We knew taking the kids to the typical folk villages and temples would result in mutiny, so we asked our guide to take us to kid-friendly destinations.  We ended up having a fantastic time, and there is definitely more than enough to experience for me to wholeheartedly recommend Jeju Island as a family vacation spot.  Here is a summary of where we went:

Psyche World
Our first stop in Jeju was a butterfly and insect museum, and it turned out to be a real treat for the kids.  The first wing we visited, Parody World, consisted of dozens of whimsical dioramas created from preserved insects, including scenes from famous movies and a self-explanatory rock band set-up simply titled, "The Beatles."  The best part, however, was Live World, where visitors can hold and take pictures with a variety of cute, fuzzy, and not-so-fuzzy animals.  The kids cuddled up with bunnies, hamsters, parakeets, cats, hedgehogs, and even a stag beetle.  As you can imagine, there were plenty of Kodak moments, and even the adults couldn't resist oohing and ahhing over all the cuteness thrust into their hands.  Apparently there's an actual butterfly house as well, but we missed it.  I'm sure that's even more magical.

Sebin White Sand Beach
This beach rivals any you can find in Hawaii.  The sand is so white and fluffy, the sea a milky jade green, and during low tide the water forms a natural kiddie pool, never exceeding 2 feet in depth, perfect for our little ones.  Our two-year-old, Emily, especially loved wading through the water and squealed with glee when tiny fish kissed her toes.  There was also horseback riding available, and the horse lady brought with her a young foal who ran around the beach like an excited puppy.

Goldenhill Herb Farm
This little farm and restaurant really reminded me of Berkeley with its laid-back naturalism.  Their specialty is a huge hamburger about a foot in diameter.  The bun is made in-house, an herb-laced sponge dough that reminded me of slightly-sweet focaccia, and stuffed with a Korean-style patty and lettuce, tomato, sweet pickle, onion, and even thinly-sliced apples, all doused in this herby goo that was absolutely delicious.  While they cook this masterpiece for you, you are treated to some fresh herb tea while the kids can wander the garden, fully visible from the windows.

Elephant Land
I have always wanted to ride an elephant, I never thought my wish would come true in Jeju of all places!  Since they're not indigenous to Korea, these Asian elephants and their mahouts were brought over from Laos.  My husband, who rode elephants in Thailand, warned me that I might not enjoy seeing these wonderful creatures being whipped into compliance, but I was happy to report back that these men at least did not use whips, but rather nudged behind the ear of the direction they wanted the elephant to go with their knees.  They also hold a few shows a day with the elephants and a variety of other animals.  During the ride, I also got to see "backstage" a bit and the elephants seemed relaxed and well cared-for, fooling around with water and snacking on dandelions.

Go-Kart Racing
There are Go-Kart tracks sprouting up all over the island, and the one we went to had no problem with our small kids going along for the ride, although they did request that the 2-year-old not drive her own car.  What a bunch of fuddy-duddies, right?  Gotta love Korean safety standards.  They did, however, provide helmets and a brief safety demonstration.  We decided to have the kids ride with a parent, and although both had a great time, something about the racing brought out the Steve McQueen in Emily.  She set her jaw tight the whole time, squinting at the track, speaking only to bark at me to go faster.  Who knew this little girl had such a need for speed?

Horse Riding
Jeju is famous for their breed of wild horses, some of which still roam free to this day.  However, there are many opportunities to go horseback riding on some very well-trained domesticated horses all around the island.  A word of warning, though: there is definitely a wide range of animal husbandry standards, and if you're at all concerned at how the horses are disciplined, make sure to ask around.  At the first place we went to, the horses cowered whenever they saw their trainer, and with good reason: once he got the pack into the woods, my husband reported that he whipped the horses quite heavily.  The second place we went to did no such thing, so hopefully this guy was an exception.

Pork Belly
Jeju is famous for its unique varieties of fish and shellfish as well as its tropical produce, but if you eat pork at all, the pork belly (sam gyup sal) is second-to-none!  Our guide took us to this unmarked building that looked like a house, and inside there was a Korean grandma and 3 tables with grills installed.  Right as we sat down, she presented us with the most gorgeous strips of pork belly I had ever seen, apparently from Berkshire (sometimes known as kurobuta or simply "black") pigs from the next town over.  She also had homemade kimchis, ssam jang, and home-grown lettuce to accompany the sizzling meat, and I seriously thought I was going to die from the yumminess of it all.  She even made some noodle soup for the kids, and showered them with kisses.

If you would like to see pictures, our Jeju vacation albums can be seen here and here.

Happy travels,
Julie

Two Houses, Both Alike in Dignity...

A guest post by Julie Kang from Geisha School Dropout.

I was complaining to my mom the other day about how hard it is to find family friends in this day and age.  "Ai goh, who would want to be your friend?  Your house and kids are so dirty, and you are so crazy!"  As you can tell, my mom has always been my biggest fan.  But she does -- and show me a Korean mom who doesn't -- have a point!

We are a happy family, but I'll admit it: we are messy.  My kids, Isaac (5) and Emily (2), constantly have dirt smeared on their faces, unwashable paint stains on their clothing, and you can usually tell what they just had for dinner from the crumbs in their hair.  This frathouse level of personal hygiene is coupled with family activities that border on pinko hippie commune: organic gardening (planting with poop), vermicomposting (a bin full of worms we keep next to our dinner table), letting the yellow mellow, and bathing every other day.  Our two dogs are given access to all parts of the house, including our beds, so every room reeks of Eau de Canine.  Needless to say, my spic-and-span parents don't come over that often, and when they do, we have to tie them down in order to stop them from trying to disinfect the place.  They don't understand how it is even legal to live like we do.

So when I first walked into Susie's house, I was immediately struck by the hospital-level cleanliness and order.  (We were there to harvest some lemons from a tree in her backyard to donate to our local food bank.)  Just beyond the entryway, there stood a glistening grand piano.  Next to it was the living room, with white couches and actual ceramic trinkets atop a glass coffee table.  I could already hear my mom moaning in pleasure at the sight of the dustless floors, her hand caressing the spotless white tile in the kitchen.  Oh yeah, if my mom were to have a sexual fetish, it would be with hard-to-clean surfaces that were clean.  She has unhealthy feelings for Mr. Clean's Magic Eraser and her Swiffer.

We got to work, and Susie and I found we had a lot in common: her kids were the same ages as mine, she was also Korean, her husband was also Japanese.  Our oldest kids will even attend the same school in the fall.  I looked over at them, Susie's daughter a proper little lady compared to my ape of a son, who was pretending to trip over a rake again and again while she tittered politely.  When we were done harvesting, I had to walk through that living room again and finally saw a sign of life: one toy fire truck on the floor.  Susie tut-tutted and immediately put it away into a perfect fire truck-shaped hole in the toy bin.  I tried to imagine the dicomfort Susie and her children would feel if they ever came over to our place, our cluttered little zoo I found so cozy.  So when I asked her for her contact info, it was mostly out of politeness.

But a few weekends later, we asked them over for hamburgers and hot dogs anyway.  It was a leap of faith, hope, and frankly, loneliness.  That day, we cleaned the bathroom, the kitchen, the junk in the backyard.  But I could still see one glaring sign of our dirty hippie lifestyle: the worm bin.  I moved the bin outdoors, apologizing to the 5000 littlest members of our family all along the way.  "Sorry, but they're KOREAN, okay?  You can digest your rotten vegetables outside for one night!"

When Susie's family came over, I ushered them directly to the backyard, hoping they didn't inhale along the way.  I showed the kids our little pile of toys and told them to have at it.  But the little boy, Emily's age, headed straight for the worm bin, asking "What is this stuff?" when he opened the lid.  My husband and I rushed over in horror, apologizing to Susie, saying oh dear, don't touch, it's so dirty.  But Susie's kids were fascinated by them.  So we gave them some limp broccoli and asked them if they wanted to break up the florets to feed to the worms.  And Susie, bless her heart, allowed them to do it, and allowed them to turn over the compost afterwards.  This was family friend-making trial by fire.

The rest of the evening flew by like a breeze.  The kids jumped into dishes of sidewalk paint and decorated our patio with their footprints.  They dug holes in the backyard and planted seeds.  They climbed trees.  They ran all around the house, playing tag and chase and monkey in the middle.  By the time dinner was ready, they were all filthy.  But we hosed them down, and everyone enjoyed their dinners.  All throughout, the parents enjoyed some uninterrupted conversation and marveled at how well everyone was getting along.  It was awesome.  This super-clean family proved to be resilient and flexible.

When it was time for them to leave, Susie's kids whined that they wanted to come back.  "You are always welcome here!" we said, and we meant it.  For the first time in my life I realized that our grungy little family, in our disheveled way, can actually contribute something beautiful to a friendship.  We can give Susie's kids an outlet to run ragged without fear of breaking anything, teach them how to live closer to the earth, and show them other ways families can live together and love each other.  When I later relayed this enchanted evening to my mom, she sniffed, "Watch, they're going to run to the nearest Korean and soon everyone will know you as the Worm Family!"

But they actually thanked us the next day and suggested ways we can hang out again.  And now our two houses, in spite of our aesthetic differences, are finding a way to make it work, hopefully forever.

Julie lives in Long Beach, CA, and has been blogging about the glorious indignities of motherhood since 2005.

The Third Generation's Tongue

Hidden among my sons' many books are three Korean board books. Two are familiar Western fables translated into Korean, another is a Korean fable. I've tried to encourage my mother and halmoni to read them to my older son, but it's never really happened. And considering that my halmoni insists on speaking to my son in broken English rather than Korean, it's no surprise.

It makes me sad that my sons will probably know just as little Korean as I do.

So when my older son asked me to read the Korean fable to him the other day, I complied. In my halting and broken Korean, I stumbled over the words as my son patiently sat next to me. Listening. Intent. One day my son - who is now just three - will stumble over English in the same way I will always stumble over hangul.

Neither of us understood the words I read.