Kimchi Mamas

To Specialize or Not To Specialize. That is the Question.

(Please forgive the "first-world problems" feel of this post.)

As my children have gotten older (they are now almost 10 and just a touch over 12), I have noticed a disturbing pattern that I may have been unaware in the past: specialization.

My daughter's into soccer. She plays in a youth sports group and they practice for about 1 hour once a week, play once a week and the season is only about 2 1/2 months long at a time. She plays probably 2-3 "seasons" a year. Though she is 12, most of the girls on her team are 10 and 11. They "play up". Playing up is based on the theory that if you raise the level of competition they will play to meet that challenge (or something like that).

Many of the girls on her team will probably leave in the next season or two to move into "club" soccer. Club soccer here is more . . . specialized. This is when teams practice 3-4 times a week for an hour or an hour and a half each practice and will play 2-3 games a weekend. They will also travel to surrounding areas (and in Texas that could mean 3+ hours of driving) and play in tournaments that go on for entire weekends (Saturdays and Sundays).

My son was participating in Tae Kwon Do and in tennis.  A few months ago, he had to make a very difficult choice: he had to choose.  He is 10 years old and he was being forced into specializing. As a 10 year old he would do tennis 2 times a week and then TKD 2 times a week and depending on visitation weekends, TKD sparring on Fridaysa and TKD tournament team on Saturdays or a tennis tournament. Tennis was 2 private lessons a week plus 'clinic' for a total of about 7 hours of tennis a week. This wasn't enough . . . his new schedule is tennis 4 days a week (about 10-12 hours a week) and an average of 2 tournaments a month (tournaments begin on Fridays and end on Sundays if you're playing well).

I look around and I see it amongst many of our friends: a 12 year old who plays club volleyball - tournaments are all weekend long and consist of many games per day, a 14 year old who is now home schooled so she can pratice tennis 8+ hours a day, and a 17 year old who has been taking tennis lessons for 12 years.

And this is just the sports side. I know children who practice piano 15-20 hours a week, a neighbor's child plays drums for school, church and 2 bands (he's 16) and on and on and on...

In all of these cases (and from personal experience) I have been told that kids HAVE to specialize if they want to remain competitive. Competitive for school, college, scholarships, professionally.

As parents we want what's best for our children.

We want opportunities for them that we didn't have.

We give them the best so they can be their best. 

We want them to be competive and have an edge.

To have THE edge.

 

 

But what does that mean? And at what cost?

Kimchi Mama Honor Roll: Sonya Thomas

This past Fourth of July Weekend, the annual Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest held a womens division for the first time.  The inaugural champion was Sonya Thomas, aka "The Black Widow," a 43-year-old Korean American, who won by eating 40 hot dogs in 10 minutes.

This is the first I had heard of The Black Widow, and I am a bit ashamed to admit that, because this was by far not her first competitive eating victory. In fact, since her debut in 2003, she has set and broken many world records, defeated men who are household names like Takeru Kobayashi and Joey Chestnut, and is currently ranked the #6 competitive eater in the world.  It is also worthy to note that Ms. Thomas achieves all this despite weighing in at 98 pounds.

After reading a few news articles, I was smitten.  I knew we Korean gals can pack it in like no one's business, but other than brief mentions on where she grew up in Korea, there was no mention of how being Korean helped or hindered her at all.  Here's the backstory, in her own words, to winning 29 competitive eating world titles.

Kimchi Mamas: Are your parents back in Korea aware of your competitive eating success, and if so, how do they feel about it?

Sonya Thomas: I think lots of Koreans feel negatively towards competitive eating, they think of it as a bit foolish: why do this instead of using your brain?  They also worry about my health, if my stomach will explode or something.  My parents were the same way when they first heard about it.  In fact, I didn't actually eat that much as a child, so they were totally surprised.  They were worried, but after they saw me on the news, they were happy for me.  Now, they're not exactly proud, but they know their daughter did something special.

KM: That sounds like the best you can ask for with any Korean parent.  Was there anything from your childhood that helps you at all today? 

ST: From childhood to now, I have always been competitive, I always want to be the best, to show people I'm special.  I'm not really outgoing, kind of shy, but anything active, I'm determined to show people I "have it."

KM: Oh wow.  Where does that drive come from?

ST: I was born in 1967, and it was a hard time for Korea, and my family was very poor.  My parents, 2 brothers, my sister, and I lived in a 1 room house.  Not a lot of people could afford to eat white rice, so they would mix their rice with barley.  But our family's rice was all barley!  The American government also gave us flour...so we had noodles everyday.  

I had to be brave, more brave then than now.  My first day of elementary school, I walked there by myself, and registered myself.  After that, I always tried to help my parents earn money.  I remember one time, I was 8 or 9, and we went to the ocean to catch clams.  I kept pushing myself to work faster and faster, and I dug up more than my mom!  About 40 pounds of clams!  Afterwards, as we opened the shells, I was the fastest.  I was the third child, but I was the boss!  [Laughs]

KM: You sound like you'd be the perfect athlete.

ST: During school, I competed a lot in sports, but I wasn't that good.  I wasn't a fast runner, I was too short and not a good enough shooter for basketball, and my reflexes were too slow for badminton.  But I still wanted to be the best at something.  Competitive eaters aren't only competitive in eating; we must be competitive in other things.  I was born like that, always wanting to do something special all the time, something different from other people.  Eating is one of my skills.  In others, if I'm not that great, i just give up and try something else. 

KM: That is so Korean!

ST: [Laughs] Yes, it's very Korean: very competitive, very "hurry hurry,' no patience.

KM: Sonya, thank you so much for taking the time out to talk to us.  Best of luck, and FIGHTING!!!

Sonya Thomas' next competition will be at the Buffalo Wing Festival in Buffalo, NY during Labor Day Weekend.

Sonya Thomas' homepage

Sonya Thomas on Wikipedia

Article from the Chosun Ilbo

The Kimchi Mama Interview: Michelle Wie

Hey, Kimchi Mamas!

I have an amazing opportunity to meet the gorgeous, glorious, golfericious Michelle Wie on Saturday, September 18, and since I'll be representing the Kimchi Mama community, I was wondering if any of y'all had some burning questions for her.  Also, any interviewing tips would be very much appreciated!  I only have 5 minutes with her, and I already budgeted 3 of them to staring like a creepy ajumma.

Over and out,
Julie

Michelle Wie online:

Black Flamingo, her personal blog (http://ablackflamingo.blogspot.com/)

@themichellewie on Twitter (http://twitter.com/themichellewie)

Michelle Wie on Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/MichelleWie)

Tae Kwon Do Rocks!

My 6-year-old, Isaac, just started attending Tae Kwon Do classes.  I figured it would be a good way to develop agility and athleticism while simultaneously introducing him to an aspect of Korean culture that he's never experienced before.  Plus, he'd look so cute in the uniform.

What caught me by surprise, however, was that athletics is only one aspect of the curriculum: much of the teaching revolves around inner qualities like respect and integrity.  It is drilled into every aspect of the class: when doing jumping jacks, the kids count out, "1 sir!  2 sir!  3 sir!"  Also, at the end of every session, they line up and individually thank their parents.  My jaw dropped when I heard that.  Gratefulness is something that can be taught?  How novel!

Isaac also brought home a sheet labeled "Homework."  I thought I'd share the content with you all because this is the kind of homework I can really get behind!

12 Home Rules for Martial Arts Students -- Practice every day!

Greet Your Parents!
When meeting: "Hi, Mom!"  "Hi, Dad!"
When leaving: "Good-bye!"

Show Respect! 
Always be respectful to parents, teachers, friends, family, and elders.

Be Kind!
Be kind to your brothers, sisters, family and friends.

Get Good Grades!
Work hard in school and try to get “A’s” every day.

Be Neat and Clean!
Keep the house neat by cleaning up after yourself.
Keep your hair, body and teeth clean every day!

Don’t Interrupt!
Do not interrupt adults when they are talking.

Eat Healthy!
Eat your vegetables and drink plenty of water every day!

Be Polite!
Say “Please” and “Thank you.”

Be Honest!
Always tell the truth, no matter what happens.

Be Responsible!
Do what you promise to do and admit when you are wrong.

Be Loving!
Say, “I love you” to your parents each day.

Be Humble!
Never brag or boast.  Let others be “first.”

(Copyright 2010 Susan Fields and World Power Martial Arts)

Isn't this list amazing???  It's like the 12 Commandments of Mom.  I love how they make each rule sound so simple and attainable.  It would take me years of nagging to get Isaac to the point of even learning these rules, let alone abiding by them.  Plus, since they come from a third party, the children are much more open to that kind of influence, for which I am extremely grateful.  So grateful in fact, I think I'm going to sign up a certain 3-year-old girl as well.

--Julie

Open Thread Thursday

It's Open Thread Thursday!

What's on your mind today?

Go Korea!  The South Korean team is advancing to the Round of 16!  wha-ee-ting!

SF Giants Korean Heritage Night

If you'e in the Bay Area, check out SF Giants Korean Heritage Night.

"The Giants would like to invite all Korean community groups and families in Northern California to join us at AT&T Park for a Wednesday night showdown with the division-rival San Diego Padres. Fans will be entertained with Korean cultural performances on the field prior to the game, and all special event ticket holders will be seated in the same section to create a community feel at the Park. Additionally, each ticket package includes a commemorative Korean-themed Giants t-shirt that is only available through this ticket offer. Come out and represent the strong connection between Korean culture and baseball at this great event!"

Sounds fabulous.

Thanks to Eleanna for the heads up!

- Mary is not a big baseball fan but perhaps it's time for a baseball game with the toddler.

World's strongest woman (a Korean woman)

Interesting blog post here about the world's strongest woman, Jang Mi-Ran who also happens to be the sponsor to Compassion's 1 millionth child.

See my previous post about Compassion here. 

I had no idea that the world's strongest woman was a Korean woman! =)  I knew that Koreans were good at weight lifting but yeah.  Cool.

DAE HAN MIN GOOK! (clap clap -- clap clap clap clap)

Is what you will hear chanted at our house tonight starting at 6pm PT (9pm ET)  as we watch Korea face off Japan in the World Baseball Classics.  The tournament has been on our set a lot during the last week, and in very rare form we consumed our dinner in front of the TV during the last two evening's semi final games.  Korea and Japan have already played each other twice during the tournament.  Korea won the first game.  Japan won the second, and now we'll just have to see tonight.  

Korea played Venezuela on Saturday and won.  Last night, Japan trounced the USA team.  My parents were rooting for USA fervently because it's such a tense and crazy game when Korea and Japan get together.  They say they didn't want the stress, so they wanted team USA to win because they'd rather lose to USA than Japan.  I, however, wanted Japan to win because 1) I'm always conflicted a bit when it's Korea vs the US.  I am both.  I know both sides of the story and want good things for both, and 2) I think it'll be way more exciting tonight for everyone if the final game is Korea vs Japan.

It's always interesting to me how much Korean Koreans have a problem with the Japanese.  I really see them as similar in a lot of ways.  In fact, the language was easy for me to learn because there was a lot of the exact same words and sentence structures in both languages.  People from both countries bow all the time, and share the love of raw fish.  Yes, I know the history.  But to me, it's just history.  It happened, and most of the people who live in both countries had nothing to do with it.

Then again, it helps me better understand the continued rift between the black and white communities even after everything is supposed to be all better now.  I guess there's a lot of old stuff still there.  

In any case, I predict there will be much yelling and throwing things at the TV tonight at our place.  Hopefully there will be some cheering too.  Will you be watching?

Walking the Tight Rope

Did you know the art of tightrope walking has a long history in Korea? 

I didn't.

Ryder Cup Big Win for USA and Asians . . .

Team USA captured the Ryder Cup this past weekend.

Big news for Team USA  considering Tiger Woods was not on the team, the team roster had more than it's fair share of rookies (6), the European team was highly favored and Team USA hasn't won a Ryder Cup since before my daughter was born - 1999 was the last time . . .

But leading the pack to victory was fellow Asian/Korean American (and transplanted Texan) Anthony "AK" Kim.  His performance at Ryder Cup has hailed comparisons to Tiger Woods - and he's been ear-marked as the next golfer with the potential ability to really challenge Woods.  He was SO "in the zone" that during play, he had to be TOLD he'd just won! 

Way to go Team USA (and a special pat on the back to "AK" from this Kimchi Mama)!

-Angie in Texas also thinks Anthony Kim is a real cutie-pie.  Shhh, don't tell anyone (hes young enough to be my dong-saeng).