My parents are a first generation Koreans. They immigrated to France soon after they got married in 1975. I was born and grew up in France. My husband came to study in Paris when he was 18. We met, dated, got married and had two children in less than 9 years.
Because I look completely Korean, people often expect me to act, talk and think like one. I struggled with feelings of inferiority and inadequacy when I went to Korea or met some of my husband's friends and colleagues. I do speak Korean well enough, but don't always understand what I am told or manage to express my opinions and reflect my personal thoughts. And this is so frustrating sometimes. This is probably why I am so worried about Sean and Will still not speaking Korean.
My in-laws had a hard time trying to mold me into something I am not. "Talk like this, don't use that word, this is not what Koreans do and you're married to a Korean now so you must adjust" they kept telling me. I tried to please them sometimes, but I never gave in.
On the outside we look like a Korean family. I cook Korean meals every day, have mastered the art of Kimchi Chigae and we love watching Korean TV shows. But inside, we are also French. And I hope that the world my children will evolve in and the people they will meet will be more understanding and embrace this. Because it is something even my husband hasn't assimilated yet. Lately we've been trying to buy a house. Apparently in Korea, the wife is the one who is in charge of house hunting and somehow, my husband expected me to take care of everything.
Boy was he disillusioned.
- Irene