Kimchi Mamas

Open Thread Thursday

Welcome to Open Thread Thursday. What's on your mind?

--The Kimchi Mamas

Got salt?

Although Little Nabi has been ready, and eager, I might add, to start potty training for a while now, we the parents have been reluctant to give up the convenience of diapers.  So we have been doing the Spotty Potty Training, a.k.a. "if she asks to sit on it, sigh a big sigh, take her upstairs to the bathroom, wait around while she forgets why she's sitting on the potty, wait some more, follow the bare bottoms around while the toddler muses on other things, return her to the potty hastily as pee or poo starts to rear (no pun intended) its drippy head" method.

We're going to bite the bullet and start.  Today.  Or maybe tomorrow.  Or perhaps it'd be simpler to do it during the weekend since I will be home all day and night and Papa Nabi seems somewhat squeamish about the whole ordeal transition.  Definitely some day before she turns sixteen.

You Say It's Your Birthday

I just got a somewhat urgent voicemail from my (Korean) dad, asking if I could please email him the birthdates (including birth years) of—*ahem*—myself, huz G, our twins, my brother, brother's wife (aka FingKASIL), and my two nephews.

We have never been a birthday-oriented kind of family (in case you didn't notice). About a year and a half ago, my dad began dating a woman. I believe said woman is whipping his delinquent-birthday-wishing butt into shape to make sure they do something other than make a quick phone call on our birthdays. Not that I care—I'm used to it.

Is it just my family or are all Korean families like this?

Making room for more mamas

I just want to share the love. Fellow sister Chicago blogger MJ (but not the Kimchi Mamas commenter of the same name), aka SugarMama, and a talented group of Filipina and Filipino-connected moms, has launched Filipina Moms ... and a dash of patis! In their own words:

We are a group of Filipino Moms around the world who collaboratively write flavorful tales and thoughts on current events, parenting, culture, tradition and what it means to be a Filipino (or married to one).

Yes, we can relate! I'm so thrilled that this voice, and some very beautiful writing, is now out there. Happy blog launch and a long life to you, Filipina Moms!

--Carol

Birth Order and IQ

The NY Times recently published an article which claimed that eldest children have higher IQs.

The study found an average of a 3 point difference in IQ, when other factors relating to IQ were factored out (stuff like the parents' educational attainment, family size, etc.).  The study was done in Norway,  based on IQs of men born between 1967 and 1976, measured when they were 18 or 19 years old.  They even compared first borns with children who were second born but became the eldest after a death in the family.  These "eldests" still had higher IQs.

I'm not Norwegian.  I wasn't born between 1967 and 1976.  I'm not male.

I will admit, I'm an eldest.  I have one little sister, and I'm pretty sure she has a higher IQ than me (if SAT scores are any predictor). Yes, I had the benefit of having my mother's sole undivided attention for the first 3 years of my life.  Yes, I remember teaching my little sister multiplication right after I learned it in third grade.  (So ironic that she's a mathematician.)  Did that make me smarter?  Maybe, maybe not.  But guess what?  I'm happy with my life, high IQ or not.  Doesn't that count for anything any more?

I'm pretty sure that when I have more children, yes, they will get treated differently than my first born.   I can imagine being slightly less paranoid with my subsequent children.  But, I don't think I'll give them any less attention or stimulation or love.  Yes, my older children will probably get to help out with the younger ones.  But will that give them higher IQ scores?  Does it matter?  Maybe I don't want to raise cautious children (typically, eldest children).  Maybe I want to raise risk-takers (typically, younger children).

How do you think this plays out in your family? 

~ eliaday

Update

Dry Cleaners win in $54 million suit for pants

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19414287?GT1=10056

I really don't think this should have even went to trial but am satisfied to see the judge pay for his actions - literally!

- Linda

Assumptions

Last weekend, one of my old college roommates got married.  My daughter and I attended the wedding, and had the chance to hang out with some of my old friends from college.  For the most part, they are still single and childless, so when the groom (my old roommate) came to hang out at our table, he wanted to make sure that I met the other young parents who were at the wedding.

"eliaday," he says, "I want to set Tae up with my friend's son."
"groom," i say, "Tae might not be straight."

... at which point there was an audible collective gasp from the table.  It wasn't that my table-mates were homophobic, I think they were just kind of surprised at what I had said. 

Open Thread Thursday

Welcome to Open Thread Thursday. What's on your mind today?

--Kimchi Mamas

Kimchi Kids Honolulu Meet-Up

Yesterday, my kimchi kids and I met up in Kahala with Kimchi Mama regular commenter and blogger "Jooliyah" and her kimchi kid ("Turtle") for a morning of swimming, eating, and fighting over toys.  As they say in Hawaii, "Cute, ya?"

Turtle wearing Wallie's floaties with Umma.

They refused to pose for a photo..."playing" the fishing game. Can you feel the tension? All hell is about to break loose.

—Stefania Pomponi Butler/CityMama

The gift-bearing traveler

It looks like the Nabis will definitely visit Korea this fall.  Yes, we're excited.  Even Little Nabi runs around talking about "going on the airplane to see Halmoni" - usually, she hooks her chubby toddler legs through one arm of our living room accent chair, leans back on the other arm and declares, "I'm driving the airplane.  I'm going to see Halmoni from the airplane!"  Of course, she also thinks Halmoni is right outside the door... ah, 2-year olds.

Even Papa Nabi can't help bragging to his friends and co-workers about our upcoming travel across the Pacific.  He's been to Europe many times but never to Asia.

And yes, I, too, am excited - my grandmother doesn't have long to live (or so my mom says - could be Korean melodramatics, though) and would like to meet LN.  Yet... despite the fact that it's at least 3-4 months away, I am already stressed thinking about what gifts we will bear.