Kimchi Mamas

H words: Why I am not a fan of "old fashioned" words

A few posts ago, I read a comment that included these words: "half breeds".

No, I am not rallying for angry responses because 1) it's obvious that there were no malicious intentions and 2) she may be referring to what OTHERS say.  It wasn't clear as the words were not in quotation marks but I am not going to pretend to be a mind reader.

In fact, I should thank her since those words got me thinking about self-identifying labels for my biracial daughter and others like her.

Half.  And other pesky fractions used to describe people.  I get lost as the denominator gets larger and larger... it's what, 2, 4, 8, 16...?  Isn't there a name for this kind of mathematical progression?  I should know, right?  Riiiiight.

Anyway.  Back to the point of this post.

Open Thread Thursday

What's on your mind today?

--The Kimchi Mamas

Cry Me a River, Paul Hamm

I read today that US Men's Gymnast Paul Hamm will not be going to compete in the Beijing this year due to a hand injury.  This news upset many in the sports community,  who thought Hamm was essential to a US medal, but my thought was, "Karma's a bitch, ain't she, Paul?"

You may recall that four years ago, American Paul Hamm eked out a gold medal in the Men's All-Around competition, over South Korean Yang Tae Young. 

You win some, you lose some, right?  A Silver Medal is nothing to sneeze at.

Not this time.  Paul Hamm won, despite a vault that landed him on top of the judge's table.  Yang Tae Young was originally declared the winner, based on a nerves-of-steel flawless performance, in which he never once landed on the judge's table.  Then, remarkably, that decision was revoked and the gold went to Hamm based on a "scoring error" that gave Hamm a .012 advantage over Yang, the closest in Olympic history.  The score was later challenged, and found to be another error. 

I am the first to admit that I don't know anything about the intricacies of world-class gymnastics scoring.  It all looks like Shakespeare and voodoo to me.  What I do know is that part of the score is derived from how the gymnast lands, and no extra points are given for taking out a judge along the way from horse to floor. 

Hanging on by a thread

I thought this might be a good time to re-introduce myself to everyone since I’ve enjoyed reading the introduction posts by our new Kimchi Mamas and the re-introductions by some of the other KM’s. I went back through the archives and discovered that I’d never really written an introduction post when I first joined the blog, so here goes!

I am a mama to two hapa kids, a daughter who is 14 and a 10-year old son. I’m a social worker, and currently work at a non-profit agency. I will soon be re-entering the university as a Ph.D. candidate in Social Work at the “seasoned” age of 40! I joke that I’m making up for time, as I spent most of my 20s and half of my 30s starting and dropping out of college and 8 years of being a stay-at-home mom. Oh, do I wish I’d had a Kimchi Mama-type group back then!

I can only guess as to my origins of birth – I know it was likely somewhere in the Daegu area of South Korea, sometime probably in 1968. The reasons for my unknown birth information is that I was found abandoned on the Daegu City Hall steps in a box, wrapped in quilts, in February of 1970 and I appeared to be about a year old. According to the city hall records, I had a note with my name and birthdate pinned inside my jacket which would have made me 14 months if accurate. I was immediately whisked off to White Lily Orphanage, run by the Catholic Church, in the city. I lived at the orphanage for 5 months before being transferred to another orphanage in Ilsan (closer to Seoul) where I stayed just over a year before I was placed on an airplane and flown to Minneapolis, Minnesota where I was picked up by my adoptive parents. I was just under 3 years old.

Stuff Korean Moms Like Blog

The Stuff Korean Moms Like blog -- written by a Korean woman named Chiyo about her crazy Korean mother -- has been mentioned before (in a comment), but I wanted to give it an "official" plug from Kimchi Mamas. Check it out -- it's freakin' hilarious!

I especially loved this post about Korean Moms hoarding plastic bags! So true!!

OO-RAH!

Anyone care to sign up with me? (Yes, I realize this is a relatively old article. I've been meaning to blog about it for... *ahem*... awhile.)

In Korea, a Boot Camp Cure for Web Obsession

Photo courtesy of Seokyong Lee for The New York Times 

Despite my self-imposed hiatus from commenting and blogging lately: Hello, my name is Janet (aka Halfmama) and I am an Internet junkie.

Out of the Box

I know it’s only half way through the summer, but I’m already thinking about the upcoming school year and all the great things (love) and the not-so great things (hate).  I love the kids are going to make new friends and are looking forward to learning new things.  I hate fund-raising (a necessary evil) and I hate some of the politics of the PTA.  But the one thing I have a real love/hate thing with is the kids’ lunches.

It’s the same every semester: I start off all enthusiastic and then taper off . . . eventually, the kids get to a point where they’re eating a school hot lunch as often as they’re eating a packed lunch.  I hate the pre-planning and the variety I feel compelled to create.

"Oriental" Makes me Cringe

My mom told me that yesterday she and Honeybee (my quappa-Korean daughter) were watching CNN and an "Oriental lady" came on the screen. My daughter immediately pointed out, "Look, Halmoni! That lady looks like you!"

My mom finds it remarkable that Honeybee, newly-turned-four, is already able to recognize "Orientals" on TV. I'm not surprised by this, actually. About six months ago, Honeybee commented on a picture of Kristi Yamaguchi, "Mummy, that looks like you!" How could I not be flattered? Kristi is hot!

What bugs me, though, is the obvious: Oriental? We live in the San Francisco Bay Area, for fuck's sake (though my mom is a relative new-comer here)! How many times have I corrected her that, around here (and in this modern world), "Oriental" has become "Asian" or "Asian American." She just shrugs and thinks that people are too sensitive, and continues to use the old Euro-centric term (and continues to deny that organic food has any value or that there's a reason to re-use plastic bags).

My mom also has the annoying habit of mentioning a person's race (except if they're the default: white) when describing them. 

"A black man from Pacific Gas and Electric came to fix my circuit breaker today."
"A Mexican woman  cut in front of me at Ross Dress for Less today."
"A nice Oriental lady helped me in the hosiery department at Macy's today."

You get the picture.

I am most offended by the "black man" description, as mom tends to say this often (we live in Oakland!) and in ear shot of African American people ... all the damned time. I cringe whenever I hear it.

Most importantly, I don't want my child to start describing people by their ethnicity when it has no bearing on what's being talked about.  Sure, there are instances when it's appropriate to describe a person by their ethnicity: when you're descrbing a perpetrator of a crime, for instance, and probably in other not-so-extreme situations; however, when a serviceman comes over to fix your plumbing, does race have anything to do with it?

P.S. The accompanying image of the egg timer is an Alessi product, which has an interesting blog post that goes along with it.  Discuss.

My soju experience(s)

I just ate at a place that had soju cocktails (it was not a Korean establishment) and was inspired to write about soju.  heh.

My first alcoholic beverage was a shot of soju at the ripe old age of 25.  It was at a po-jang-ma-cha (translation - street restaurant?) in Korea.  I think I had like 3 shots... and I got pretty drunk. I remember the first shot being surprisingly decent tasting but after that, I had to force them down. I didn't want to look "weak" in front of my companions. =)

Soju seems to be becoming more and more popular in America.  I read in an article that because it doesn't have a strong flavor, it is good for mixing.  Rings true.  I prefer the mixed soju drinks over just soju.  They taste better.  There is yogurt-soju, lemon-soju, strawberry-soju, pineapple-soju, kiwi-soju, and other flavors too.  My husband says that soju gives you a really bad hangover but I'm not sure if that is true or not.  I agree with him that it tastes pretty bad.

Hi, I'm the non-Kimchi Mama!

Recently, Carol posed a question asking why folks that were not Korean, Korean America, Korean American adoptees (KAD), or in a relationship with any of the above come to this site.  So here's my re-introduction.

Hi, I'm eliaday.  I am not Korean, Korean American, an adoptee, nor am I in a relationship with any of the above.  I am a Chinese American single mom working in education.

So why am I here? 

Well, two years ago when this blog was started by the fabulous Nina and Stefania and others, I was married to a Korean American, which whom I had an 18 month old daughter.  We were living in socal, 10 minutes away from Halmony and Harabeogi.

Fast forward to today:  Now, I am divorced from my daughter's father, living in Boston, 30 minutes away from Gi-gi and Pop-pop (what my daughter calls my parents).

In a way, I am far far away from the things that initially attracted me to reading blogs like Charlie and Nina, Weigook Saram, and City Mama. I don't really have a Korean MIL to deal with, the Korean American man in my life isn't really present (he lives in LA).  Boston doesn't have a big Korean American population at all.  So what's my connection?