As many regular readers know by now, I am still a Korean citizen. By nationality. By passport. By "hell no, you can't vote in this country because your country and this country do not have a dual-citizenship pact".
I am a permanent resident, tax paying legal alien. Those of you who were ready to dial Homeland Security, you may step away from the phone now. And no, you can't get me deported just because you find my posts annoying or because I rub you the wrong way. My ex wanted to get me deported because I wanted to divorce him.
Speaking of... I usually save rantings about my ex for my own blog but I thought I'd share this on Kimchi Mamas since it's kimchi-related.
While I was still married to my ex, I knew that it irritated him to no end that I would tell our daughter, Little Nabi, that she is both Korean and American.
Papa Nabi: Why would you tell her that?
Mama Nabi: Because it's true...?
Papa Nabi: No, it's not. She's born here. So she's just American.
Mama Nabi: But she also has a Korean mother.
Papa Nabi: Yeah, but she's not a Korean citizen.
Mama Nabi: Only because there isn't a formal agreement. Take [your co-worker] for example. He's an American citizen...
Papa Nabi: No, he's not. He's Belgian.
Mama Nabi: Actually, he's a French citizen.
Papa Nabi: No... oh. Yeah... but...
Mama Nabi: But you think of him as Belgian because his father is Belgian and he calls himself Belgian although he has a dual French and American citizenship since his mother is American.
Papa Nabi: Whatever. I think you're just confusing her. She ain't gonna know who she is.
Tonight, Little Nabi came home after spending a few hours with her daddy. Right before her bedtime books, I overheard her arguing with her imaginary friend, "Lisa".
"I am Korean. I am not only American. My mommy says I am Korean, too. Why did your daddy say that? My daddys says that, too! Oh! That makes me mad. Don't say I'm not Korean. You are hurting my feelings, Lisa. I don't want to talk to you anymore."
After a bit of probing and more role playing with Mommy joining in as "Girl Monster", I found out that my ex spent precious parenting moments trying to "unbrainwash" her. It seems LN was insisting that she is Korean AND American. And her dad was insisting that she is ONLY American because she was born here.
LN wanted to confirm with me that since her halmoni and mommy are Korean, she, too, can be Korean. "And American," I added. She said, "Yes. Korean. And American. Right, Mommy?"
Right.
I think she knows who she is. What do you think?
-Mama Nabi
